his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
I can't adult today.
Take a nap and try again
I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
Randomize
