So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
Just used the salt in the bottom of my mcdonalds bag from last night on the eggs i made this morning. Way too hungover for this
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
How's work?
Spinning.
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
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