So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
Randomize
