Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
Randomize
