very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
My mom just drunkenly told me i was conceived in the back of a car, at a Bon Jovi concert.
I drunkenly recorded an episode of Family Matters last night. I took a shot everytime Carl Winslow had a mustache.
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
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