butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
I can feel you judging me through the phone.
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
All I do lately is eat steak, drink warm beer, watch porn, and avoid booty calls when I'm too lazy to take a shower. I think the apocalypse turned me into a dude.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
Randomize
