I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
Remind me to tell you the one about the cashier that wouldn't sell me Jim Beam and NyQuil.
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
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