I can't believe the cop was so cool about the whole thing, I mean, I had man mayo all over my jeans.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
Having a midget officiate your wedding because you think it'd be hilarious: good idea or potential lawsuit?
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize