is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
I just saw a guy give a mop to his fat wife and say "Look, an exercise stick!"
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
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