Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
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