I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
i just shit an entire soup salad and breadsticks from the olive garden... bud light wins again.
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
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