we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
I found a body half wedged into my bedroom wall this morning. How do I explain THIS to the carpenters?
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
Randomize
