you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
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