He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
I bought a Christmas tree in my drunken state last night, after walking a half mile in search of vino and prior to my apparently playing boardgames with my boyfriend's family. There is no way you are on my level.
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
Randomize
