It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
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