I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
Last night, my friend changed all my contacts in my phone. I have been texted by Batman, Donatello, and Hermione Granger. I have no idea who they are, and it doesn't upset me at all.
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
Randomize
