He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
my sisters under your porch take her home
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
Randomize
