Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
Randomize