At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
Randomize