if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
Randomize
