Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
it's great music for shaving your balls
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
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