either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
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