jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
I'm laying in the fetal position on the floor of my kitchen eating potato salad with my fingers. Please come over with some real food and keep me company.
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
Randomize
