I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
Look I know it's late and I hope this doesn't wake you up but I feel like you should know that I'm sleeping on my couch in my own apartment so that my friend can get laid in my bed, and I would do the same for you.
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
all i tweeted was "emergency this is not a drill" and he immediately texted me asking if this was a subtle booty call…it was
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
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