Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
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