Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
on the way to work, i saw an empty wine bottle sitting in the middle of an intersection. i thought of you.
i can respect that.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
