I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
Bad news. I baked you a cake and one of my fingernails is missing.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
Is that strawberry winking at me??
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
