no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
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