Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
My boss just called me for legal advice. What has my life become?
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
I'm too stoned to come over for sex
Yes that is a Krispy Kreme doughnut on my cock
I'll be right over
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
Randomize
