The guy dancing on me has three visible teeth. WHERE ARE YOU?
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
this will be a night to untag.
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
Randomize
