No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
Randomize
