week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
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