Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize
