remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
Randomize
