Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
Randomize
