There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Randomize
