Dual....:-)
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
She told me she brought a guy home but that he looked pickled. And no, that's not an autocorrect.
Hahahah pickled
I asked her what she meant and she said that he looked like he had soaked in water.
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Randomize
