I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
