Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
my drunk uncle just explained that turkeys are not gentle lovers... and no context doesn't make it better.
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me..
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
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