Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
Dude, I just saw a bird vs. squirrel fight. A car won.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
Randomize
