Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
So, you didn't have time to come pick me up but you did have time to get plastered and then write "champagne money" on every one of my statuses for the past month?
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
Unintentional and slightly frustrating adventures are basically all I'm good for. Expect heart palpitations, cheap food, and homeless men serenading us.
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
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