Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
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