We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
Randomize
