well you can't waste a boner
I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
Randomize
