no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
Our house almost burnt down last night. I woke up at 4:10am to the smoke alarm going off bc the bean bag chair was on fire so i extinguished it and smoked a bowl at 4:20 to celebrate my fire extinguishing abilities
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
Randomize
