Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
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