Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize