I'm so drunk I cant read cursive anymore.
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
Randomize