two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
This is not a drill. I need a cape. And a tuxedo. Simultaneously. Repeat. NOT. A. DRILL....
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
Randomize
