new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
Randomize
