I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
Randomize
