Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
remember when you told me, jokingly, to not get jizz on your shirt that i borrowed last night?
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
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