I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
She's officially a Tinder poltergeist.
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
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